


Be Less Chill

by ostrichbacca



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: F/F, Group chat, M/M, and it just gets gayer, everyone is really really gay, post-musical but jeremy and christine didn't date
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-28 18:35:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11423760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ostrichbacca/pseuds/ostrichbacca
Summary: Jeremy adds the idiots to a gc together. It's a bad idea.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is a bad idea

  
Jeremumbles added canigulads, lookitsbrooke, saintvalentine, jakeydill, shortnready2fite, tiredgaystoner and cinnamonrolan.

jeremumbles named the chat "heck"

jeremumbles: hey guys i just wanna say

jeremumbles: sorry about everything that happened

jeremumbles: yanno w/ the squip and stuff

jeremumbles: i did some crap and like

jeremumbles: no hard feelings

canigulads: you don't need to apologise jeremy! we all did things we're not proud of that night it's okay

shortnready2fite: i didnt do shit i was in hospital im not responsible for anyof the shit that happned

jeremumbles: to be fair i only added you so you didn't feel left out man

shortnready2fite: *didn't *I'm *any of *happened (also thanks bud)

jakeydill: jfc bro u don't gotta correct all your shit

shortnready2fite: I feel unfulfilled if I don't

cinnamonrolan: also u didnt correct ur lowercase i's

saintvalentine: stfu jenna noone cares

lookitsbrooke: jenna ur grammar is shit too you're not fooling anyone

cinnamonrolan: touché

canigulads: I just want to reiterate what jeremy said about the squips! I barely remember it but sorry for anything I did!

cinnamonrolan: christine no ones blaming you for anything youre great

canigulads: thanks jenna ;) (no homo)

jakeydill: what the fuck is going on

shortnready2fite: shhhhhh love is blossoming don't interiot it

shortnready2fite: *interrupt

tiredgaystoner: YO WHATD I MISS

tiredgaystoner: also i think im the 1 who deserves most of the apologies bc i was left with the burden of saving the day so fuck all of you

jakeydill: who the fuck is this

tiredgaystoner: michael mell who the fuck is this

jakeydill: who the fuck is michael mell

tiredgaystoner: me biatch

shortnready2fite: he's the one that brought the red dew remember bro

jakeydill: nope

cinnamonrolan: he spent ur halloween party in ur bathroom having a meltdown

tiredgaystoner: rather u wouldnt spout that everywhere but yeah thats true

jakeydill: still no

jeremumbles: he was the only person i ever talked to, before i got a squip??

jakeydill: nooope

lookitsbrooke: rich wrote riends on his backpack?

jakeydill: noioooiio

saintvalentine: p sure he kissed a tree or smth in elementary school

jakeydill: a) wtf guy 2) nooooooooope

tiredgaystoner: you srsly have no idea,,,, we were in kindergarten together dude

jakeydill: no offence guy but idk

tiredgaystoner: i got suspended in middle school for telling people how gay history rlly was like willy shakes being bi and all of the ancient greeks being totally queer

canigulads: rt

jeremumbles: rt

jakeydill: this is ringing no bells bud

tiredgaystoner: dude i dated your cousin for like a month?? i live like 4 houses away from you??? i drive a pt cruiser

shortnready2fite: no offence jake but you're a fucking idiot

shortnready2fite: he's gay stoner kid bro

jakeydill: SHIT GAY STONER KID

jakeydill: sorry guy you're good

saintvalentine: so where we're we

shortnready2fite: *were

lookitsbrooke: fuck off rich

shortnready2fite: jakey defend me bro

jakeydill: lay off brooke

shortnready2fite: thonx bb x

jakeydill: no homo

tiredgaystoner: sure, jan

jakeydill: was i just sassed by heere's bf

jeremumbles: i'm not gay what the heck why do people think that

canigulads: to be fair, the only girl you ever dated was while you were being mind controlled by a japanese computer drug

tiredgaystoner: u aint foolin no one bb ;)))) <333

jeremumbles: no homo

lookitsbrooke: 3 people so far have said no homo and every time it has been very homo

saintvalentine: no homo


	2. gettin gay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rich is seeking advice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what the hell am i doing

shortnready2fite -> tiredgaystoner

shortnready2fite: mikey I need your help

tiredgaystoner: it's what i'm here for what's got your goat

tiredgaystoner: also please never call me mikey again

shortnready2fite: i'm very bi for jake

shortnready2fite: I've enlisted your help because you have a lot of experience with crushes on best friends

tiredgaystoner: k so what youre gonna do

tiredgaystoner: first establish your non-straight sexuality

~~~

shortnready2fite changed the group name to "gay squip squad"

shortnready2fite: I mean let's be real

shortnready2fite changed their nickname to shortbisexualrich

jeremumbles: how many times I'm not gay I swear

canigulads: that may be but you are pan as heck don't deny it

jeremumbles: im disgruntled

~~~

shortbisexualrich -> tiredgaystoner 

tiredgaystoner: engage him in as much homoerotically charged conversation as possible

~~~

gay squip squad

jakeydill: what

shortbisexualrich: you seem confused

jakeydill: a little bro yeah

shortbisexualrich: sexually confused maybe

jakeydill: maybe

jakeydill: no homo

~~~

shortbisexualrich -> tiredgaystoner

tiredgaystoner: get close to him

tiredgaystoner: physically i mean

tiredgaystoner: hang out with him and sit a little closer than usual, touch his arm or w/e

~~~

jakeydill -> canigulads

jakeydill: christine i need help i think rich is coming on to me and i'm not sure what to do

canigulads: how so?

jakeydill: wym 

canigulads: how is he coming on to you?

jakeydill: well we were hanging out today and he was sitting real close and touching my arm and shit and he leant his head on my shoulder a couple times

jakeydill: he was being really shy tho too a lot of the time

jakeydill: kinda cute actually

jakeydill: do you think i was reading too much into it

canigulads: absolutely not haha from what you said it sounds like he's pretty into you 

jakeydill: so what do i do man

canigulads: well... do you like him?

jakeydill: i mean sure! we've been friends for so long and he's cute and all but like

jakeydill: i'm not gay

canigulads: well neither is he! he's bi remember

jakeydill: i guess youre right

jakeydill changed their nickname to jake "queer" dillinger

canigulads: no

jake "queer" dillinger changed their nickname to jake **bi** llinger

canigulads: better

jake **bi** llinger: wish me luck

~~~

jake **bi** llinger -> shortbisexualrich

jake **bi** llinger: nice name

shortbisexualrich: no too bad yourself ;)

jake **bi** llinger: :)

shortbisexualrich: no homo

jake **bi** llinger: :(


	3. outrageous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they all get stoned and watch bake off

gay squip squad

jake **bi** llinger: im bored where is erryone

lookitsbrooke: im w chlo but u cant come. vv secret girl time.

jake **bi** llinger:: right so a date

jake **bi** llinger: anyone else

canigulads: I'm @ rehearsal sorry

canigulads: and jenna is with family

jake **bi** llinger:: wow she has one of those??

jake **bi** llinger: changed their nickname to saltyjake

saltyjake: rich b where ya at

shortbisexualrich: i'm in Michael's basment with him andjeremt

saltyjake: ew why

shortbisexualrich: *basement *and jeremy

shortbisexualrich: we're geting stoned and watch Great British Bake Iff

saltyjake: sounds lit im coming over

shortbisexualrich: *getting *Off

shortbisexualrich: shit no

saltyjake: god i hope not

shortbisexualrich: well jeremy probably is michaels head is basically on his crotch

shortbisexualrich: things are probably going to escalate to explicit homoeroticism soon you should get here quick before it does

-

shortbisexualrich: oh it's okay michael just said no homo it's all good

\--

lookitsbrooke: wait ur watching gbbo what season

jeremumbles: 3 why

saintvalentine: ok wrre comin over

tiredgaystoner: please no my basement is not big and i dont think i have enough weed for six people

saintvalentine: chill weve got our own

jeremumbles: did we not agree to never use the word chill again

saintvalentine: fuck u i do what i want

cinnamonrolan: cgristine n i r comin too

shortbisexualrich: i think you guys are really overestimating the size of this basement

cinnamonrolan: i think ur underestimating my determination bitchhh

\---

saltyjake: bitch ofc it's collapsing you didn't chill it you fucking idiot

shortbisexualrich: why are you texting we're literally all in the same room

saltyjake: i didn't want to ruin this tender moment were all havin

lookitsbrooke: u mean this moment

lookitsbrooke: in a small smoky sweaty room

saltyjake: yes

tiredgaystoner: i think im in love w john whaite

jeremumbles: the heck michael i thought you were in love w/ me

tiredgaystoner: that too

canigulads: aww

shortbisexualrich: i think wenjust witnessed something beautiful

saintvalentine: ur right

shortbisexualrich: *we just

cinnamonrolan: and u ruined it

tiredgaystoner: jeremy i would kiss you rn but i'm physically incapable of lifting my head off your lap

lookitsbrooke: just kiss his crotch itll be fine

tiredgaystoner: crotch = smooched

saltyjake: this is the weirdest and most homoerotically charged situation ive ever been in

shortbisexualrich: don't deny it you're enjoying this

saintvalentine: what no ryan cant win star baker he came last in technical

canigulads: this is an outrage


	4. gay plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> michael concocts a plan

gay squip squad

saltyjake: michael wtf was that

canigulads: what did he do?

saltyjake: he got a damn months detention for preaching his gayness to miss harley in health class

jeremumbles: context??

tiredgaystoner: aight let me explain

tiredgaystoner: we were in health class learning abt sex and shit

tiredgaystoner: which is completely useless to me bc 1. i already know everything there is to know abt sex and 2. they only ever teach abt het sex which is an outrage

shortbisexualrich: rt

tiredgaystoner: so when she asks for questions i stick up my hand and start askin like "what if you don't want to have sex with someone of the opposite gender" until it devolved into "i'm gay as shit so what am i supposed to do"

tiredgaystoner: and she gets pissed and drags me outta class

tiredgaystoner: meanwhile i'm still ranting abt my shit

tiredgaystoner: and she's pissed bc,, well we all know how homophobic she is right

canigulads: preach

tiredgaystoner: then she has the audacity

tiredgaystoner: the fucking AUDACITY

tiredgaystoner: to tell me that it was just a phase

tiredgaystoner: or that i was faking it to look cool???? like i'm not cool either way bud

tiredgaystoner: so she's basically saying that gay people arent real and then she fucking gives me a months detention

saintvalentine: that's low even by my standards

tiredgaystoner: so.

tiredgaystoner changed the group name to "gay plan"

cinnamonrolan: ???

tiredgaystoner: we have to make this school as gay as possible

tiredgaystoner: get ur friends to make out w each other by harley's office n shit

saltyjake: yeah bc so many people will be up for that

shortbisexualrich: speak foryourself I'm totally down

saltyjake: ;)

shortbisexualrich: *for yourself

lookitsbrooke: jfc rich u rlly r great at ruining moments

lookitsbrooke: anyway im so down

lookitsbrooke: chlo we better get practicing

saintvalentine: ;)

canigulads: ok this sounds like a lot of fun

cinnamonrolan: im so ready 2 b gay out of spite

jeremumbles: well somebody better go,,, be gay,, in close proximity to miss harley before lunch is over,,,, we gotta get this plan in motion

tiredgaystoner: i'm on the case come w me tho

jeremumbles: ;)

tiredgaystoner: ',:)

cinnamonrolan: ugh quit being gay here make urself useful go do it by miss harley instead

saintvalentine: lol "do it"

saltyjake: please dont have sex

tiredgaystoner: :)


	5. gay plan pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jeremy has a revelation and jake gets a bit stuck

jeremumbles -> shortbisexualrich

jeremumbles: rich i need your help it concerns the plan

shortbisexualrich: let me guess

shortbisexualrich: you've been gaying it up with michael to spite miss harley but you've been getting a little too into it and now you don't know how to feel

jeremumbles: not how i would've,, phrased it, but essentially yes

jeremumbles: so I guess i like him,,. but i still like girls so like, i can't be gay right

shortbisexualrich: do you see my name

shortbisexualrich: or remembr when christine said you were pan and you agreed??

shortbisexualrich: *remember

shortbisexualrich: you don't have to be gay to like guys

jeremumbles: ok so what do i do abt michael

shortbisexualrich: well you like him right? and you're already all over each other all the time it's not much of a change to date or whatever

jeremumbles: what've i got to lose

shortbisexualrich: go get your pan on bro

~~~

gay plan

cinnamonrolan: hows the plan goin 4 every1 else cuz were having 1 hell of a time

tiredgaystoner: well i've already nearly been suspended

saltyjake: we've had 6 people yell "gay" @ us like that wasn't fucking obvious and the point

saintvalentine: brooke and i have had 2 guys propose threesomes w us

lookitsbrooke: little fucks

jeremumbles: one thing this scheme has brought me is a gr8 revelation

tiredgaystoner: oh really........... what might that be...

jeremumbles: im pan n i like michael

canigulads: aw

saintvalentine: cute

tiredgaystoner: like u 2 bb

jeremumbles: <3

shortbisexualrich: tbh jer you're a little late to the party like we've all already realised that we're queer and in love with each other

saltyjake: it was only a matter of time until your epiphany

jeremumbles: wait so you guys are all like gay for each other

saintvalentine: yes?? how did you not know

jeremumbles: well no one informed me of this

lookitsbrooke: remember in michaels basement when we were all lying on top of each other? rich was literally on jakes lap

jeremumbles: well we were all high or drunk so i assumed our judgement was impaired

shortbisexualrich: oh no my judgement was not impaired in the slightest ;)

jeremumbles: stop

\---

saltyjake: FUCK

canigulads: what's wrong?

saltyjake: MY FOOT

canigulads: what about it?

saltyjake: ITS STUCK

canigulads: where?!

saltyjake: A FENCE

canigulads: how?!?!

saltyjake: I DONT FUCKING KNOW OKAY

saltyjake: MY FEET ARE TOO FUCKING BIG

cinnamonrolan: well u know what they say about that

shortbisexualrich: the saying is true I should know

saltyjake: GOD BABE PLEASE SHUT UP AND HELP ME

shortbisexualrich: I can't I'm in class

saltyjake: well fuck

tiredgaystoner: don't fret i'm out of class i'll come help

saltyjake: no i know youll just show up to laugh @ me

tiredgaystoner: ya got me

saltyjake: auaaaguhhggh

\---

saltyjake: IVE BEEN HERE FOR 2 HOURS YOU AWFUL CONDESCENDING FUCKFACES

saintvalentine: im on my way w wire cutters

saltyjake: ITS NOT A GODDAMN WIRE FENCE

saintvalentine: ur not outside the school??

saltyjake: NO YOU SHITHEAD

lookitsbrooke: well where r u?

saltyjake: IM STUCK IN SOME RANDOS PICKET FENCE OKAY

saintvalentine: what the actual fuck jake

tiredgaystoner: now this throws a wrench into the gears of our plan

saltyjake: how????

tiredgaystoner: well you can hardly do much gay shit if you're permanently on stuck in a fence can you

saltyjake: fucking WATCH me bitch


	6. fuck out my way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what has jake done now

shortbisexualrich -> saltyjake

shortbisexualrich: babe are you still in that fence

saltyjake: YEA ITS FUCKING MIDNIGHT AND NO ONE HAS COME TO HELP

shortbisexualrich: oh

saltyjake: help

~~~

gay plan

shortbisexualrich: someone really needs to go get jake out of the fence he's still stuck

saintvalentine: wait still

shortbisexualrich: yes he's angry

saltyjake: MOTHERFUCKING YES IM ANGRY

lookitsbrooke: im on my way 2 save the day w a swiss army knife

saltyjake: THABK FUCKIN GOD

shortbisexualrich: pick me up on the way will you

shortbisexualrich: I want to look like I'm being helpful

lookitsbrooke: ugh fine

saltyjake: AAAUA HURRY UP THO

\---

tiredgaystoner: wait is jake out of that fence yet

canigulads: i hope so?? schools abt to start id be worried if he wasnt

lookitsbrooke: ...... thats a debatable question

jeremumbles: ????

lookitsbrooke: yes,, hes no longer in the randos yard

jeremumbles: but??

lookitsbrooke: ull have 2 wait n see :)

canigulads: oh god

-

cinnamonrolan: o shit

canigulads: what??

cinnamonrolan: jake just walked into homeroom

canigulads: yeah?

cinnamonrolan: the fence is still on his fucking leg

saintvalentine: how do i get dress coded for my knees and he doesnt for a fuckin picket fence

canigulads: on that subject how do i get dress coded for a tank top but rich doesnt

tiredgaystoner: i mean either way it'll arouse jake so really what's the diff

saintvalentine: omg jakes hitting so many peoples ankles and not even apologising i think we broke him

lookitsbrooke: son of a bitch i just got kicked too wtf hurts like a bitch

shortbisexualrich: you're complaining?? you don't know pain at fucking all

jeremumbles: oh boy what happened

shortbisexualrich: well I was there when brooke sawed jake outta the fence right and brooke dropped us both off at his house, like ofc he was still pissed but,,

jeremumbles: jfc i don't need to know abt you guys screwing

shortbisexualrich: bUT HE STILL HAD THE FUCKING FENCE ON HIS LEG don't get me wrong it was gr8 BUT STILL

\--

canigulads: oh god jake was walking between classes and he just suddenly slammed his leg into the wall

canigulads: pros = no more fence leg  
cons = there is a massive dent in the wall and everyone is staring

tiredgaystoner: he's been through a lot leave him be

saltyjake: I FUCKING HATE EVERYTHING

\---

tiredgaystoner: so anyway back to the plan

saltyjake: still pissed

tiredgaystoner: still don't care

lookitsbrooke: well chloe and i got a detention is that a good or bad thing

jeremumbles: it sure is something

tiredgaystoner: i guess we'll see you there then lmao

saintvalentine: u guys got detention?

jeremumbles: well michael already had a month but we both got another week for like standing too close or some shit

tiredgaystoner: don't lie we were totally making out but to be fair still a shitty reason for a week's detention

\---

cinnamonrolan: omg guys which one of u was playing cupcakke thru the pa

cinnamonrolan: ik it was 1 of u bc lets b real who else would blast lgbt

canigulads: i heard that omg yeah

jeremumbles: michael?

tiredgaystoner: ok shockingly it wasn't me

jeremumbles: really?? wow.,,

cinnamonrolan: so who was it

shortbisexualrich: :)


	7. lasers

cinnamonrolan -> canigulads

cinnamonrolan: boo where u @

canigulads: I was abt to text you were all going lasertagging u wanna come?

cinnamonrolan: hecc ya

~~~

saltyjake added shortbisexualrich, tiredgaystoner, jeremumbles, saintvalentine, lookitsbrooke, canigulads and cinnamonrolan.

saltyjake named the chat "laser gays"

lookitsbrooke: do we rlly need another gc its literally the exact same ppl as the other 1

shortbisexualrich: don't question his methods

jeremumbes: anyway teams

saltyjake: yeaa teams

tiredgaystoner: yes

canigulads: there are 4 different team colors at this place I think? and there are 8 of us so

saintvalentine: pretty sure we already know what the teams r gonna b then

lookitsbrooke: yeah lets b real

shortbisexualrich: I call red team

tiredgaystoner: fuck you bitch

saltyjake: jesus christ michael

tiredgaystoner: i'm sorry

jeremumbles: its ok we can be blue

tiredgaystoner: i can live with that

cinnamonrolan: christine nd i call green

lookitsbrooke: is there pink? i want pink

-

shortbisexualrich: YALL ARE GOING THE FUCK DOWN

shortbisexualrich changed their nickname to itsrichbitch

itsrichbitch: GET READY TO DIE FUCKERS

tiredgaystoner: ok

saltyjake: babe please

itsrichbitch: GET FUCKING FUCKED JAKE

-

itsrichbitch: END OF ROUND ONE YALL GOT FUCKING WRECKED

saltyjake: rich please i love you but stop

itsrichbitch: *Y'ALL

saintvalentine: jfc

tiredgaystoner: rich you're not even winning i don't understand

canigulads: im assuming it was rich i heard screaming wildly during the game

jeremumbles: who else

cinnamonrolan: hey how come i didnt see chlo or brooke the whole round

tiredgaystoner: i think you know why

lookitsbrooke: ;)

-

saltyjake: SOMEONE IS SNIPING ME FROM THE WINDOW I KNOW ITS YOU MICHAEL

tiredgaystoner: you can't prove anything

saltyjake: I JUST SAW YOU TYPE THAT

tiredgaystoner: don't overexert yourself with all that yelling

tiredgaystoner: FUCK YOU JAKE

-

canigulads: i havent seen brooke or chloe all game but i keep gettin got outta nowhere and i think they are behind it

saintvalentine: :)

lookitsbrooke: :)

saintvalentine: :)

lookitsbrooke: :)

saintvalentine: :)

cinnamonrolan: sTOP

\--

jeremumbles: brooke how are you guys winning i dont understand

lookitsbrooke: im just that good

saintvalentine: ive been lasertaggin since the day i was born

tiredgaystoner: this is not a fair fight fuck you guys

lookitsbrooke: WERE JUST GREAT ACCEPT IT

saintvalentine: u guys never stood a chance

cinnamonrolan: fuckin lesbians

canigulads: babe no

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh I half-assed this chapter sorry


End file.
